Hhhh…. yes, folks. That is a picture of the nails on my left hand. I’m a nail biter. Always have been and always will be. I’m not sure when this habit started, I just know I was really young when it did. My Mother said my Dad was a nail biter so that is likely where I got it from. However, in hindsight, I’m pretty sure I got the nasty habit from her. Well okay, maybe not from her but because of her.
If you follow my blog, you may have read the blog in which I discussed my childhood growing up and being a victim of child abuse at the hands of my Mother. I’m pretty sure my childhood brought about this nasty little habit. I’m a reformed nail biter though and only seem to bite in times of stress.
I quit this ugly “habit” my sophmore year in high school and it wasn’t easy. I saved up my allowance and bought all these nail products like nail strengthener, nail growth, and nail bite no more. I was tired of hiding my fingers to the world and so done with being jealous of my friends pretty long nails. So I decided I was going to kick the habit. And I did.
It remains one of my greatest triumphs to this day if I’m to be completely honest. I’m sure you’re wondering why it is I consider it to be a triumph when I still clearly bite my nails, right? Simple. Because prior to that time, I always chomped on my nails and I couldn’t or wouldn’t stop. But one day I just decided to quit cold turkey and I was sucessful.
The only time I bite my nails these days are due to times of stress. You see, when I get severely stressed, my body reacts in some certain way. When I was 13 years old, I stopped having my period for nearly a year until I was finally (and thankfully) removed from my Mother’s house. I chomped on my nails because I lived in constant fear of when the next beating would come. I would get these horribly, horrific rashes on my skin that the doctor’s could never figure out what they were. No amount of creams would get rid of the rash and so I would live with digging at my skin to try to relieve some of the itchiness these rashes would bring. I was a medical mess.
But then I was moved into a foster home that would eventually become my forever home (they took guardianship of me) and these things changed. The period came back (woo hoo?), the rashes mysteriously disappeared but the nail biting remained. At that point in my life, it was a bit of a security blanket so I didn’t really know how to stop.
So after years of biting non-stop, I now only bite when I’m stressed. There are levels of stress too. Like I might only chew on 1 nail and then I’m good. Then I might chew off all of my nails, realize what I’m up to and stop altogether. There are times where I need the yucky bite no more stuff on my nails to make it stop but then there are other times… These are the times when I don’t care how awful the bite no more stuff tastes, I bite right through it all. Once I hit that point, there is only one thing I know I can do to make it stop sooner rather than later. It’s time to go to my nail salon and get the fakers put on.
Having fake nails on really helps because even I can’t chew through those bad boys. It’s not that I don’t try to, it’s just that I can’t. So because of this, over time, I start putting my fingers to my mouth to bite less and less until I don’t do it anymore. Then the fake nails begin to get on my nerves and that is when I know it’s okay to have them removed. So I do and then I’ve kicked the nasty habit again.
Right now, I’m in the midst of a combination of bite no more and regular clear polish to stop the habit. So far it’s working.
Oh there is a medical term for this condition as well and it’s called Onychopaghia. With more and more research, they’re actually placing nail biters into the “OCD” category. This I find funny because though I refer to it as a bad habit, I knew it was more than that. When you realize that your bad habit only comes during times of stress or anguish, you decide at that point it’s likely more of a mental issue. So the fact that scientists are now just deciding to call it a mental disorder is funny to me. Maybe I missed my calling as a scientist?
My oldest was a nail biter and he’s managed to quit and my other 2 children show no signs of nail biting. Truth be told, I’m always telling my younger 2 to please clip their claws and talons. They could use a little nail biting in their life if you ask me.
Someday, I hope to never have to deal with this issue again but until then, I will single-handedly keep the nail business successful.
NellaMae B.
My Journey.. 